Lupron, Resolve & and My Fluttery Heart

Last night was an evening of firsts for this IFer...

1st self-given shot!
1st fertility injection
1st shot of Lurpon (let the IVF cycle begin).  My hands were shaking, and I almost called in the husband for back up support, but then, just like that, I jabbed it in and it was over.  It actually didn't hurt, which was a relief, and there was no blood to clean up, or any great to do.

I thought at first that I'd avoided the side effects, that was until I went to get into bed and realized my heart was fluttering like a hummingbird, and my head felt like it might explode.  I tried meditation, movie watching, etc., but I just could not fall asleep.  I finally succumbed to half a Xanax, some Tylenol, and a promise to myself that I would do the shot earlier in the evening the next night and hope for a better outcome. 

The rest of my medication arrived yesterday, and I kid you not when I say I almost fainted when I opened the box.  Here is the pile o' meds and syringes that greeted me, minus the Lurpon which was already in the fridge:

 

The best part was, of course, the free gift of Love and Infertility - thanks Village Pharmacy for assuming my marriage must be falling to pieces around our infertility.  

*actually, an amusing side note.  I had just listened to a Creating a Family podcast with Kristen Magnacca earlier in the day, and was kind of shocked when her book turned up among my fertility medications.

After recovering from the shock of all these meds, I of course decided I needed a photo (for posterity - look kids, this is how you started out), and just to remind myself where all our money has gone.

DH came home a little while later, and surprised me with these:

Mind you, my hubby hates "wasting money" on flowers "that are going to die in a day", so the fact that he brought these home for his half-crazed, anxiety-ridden wife, who absolutely loves flowers in all shapes and sizes, was pretty darn special and the perfect thing to lift my spirits. 

1st Resolve Meeting

This was a pretty special event for me.  I truly enjoyed meeting so many people who really not only understand what I am going through, but who "speak my language".  We talked of everything from IVF protocols, to the emotions of miscarriage, the loss of friends, fears about the future, etc. and we joked and laughed together for a good 3 hours.  I could not have been happier that I went, and I just want to thank them all (though I think only one of you ladies might actually see this - "hi G") for giving me such a great experience.

If you haven't been to one of these meetings yet, and there is one in your area, check it out.  You will feel better for it.    

Happy Thursday everyone!