So, with all the fun-filled and well-meaning family time of this time of year I'm feeling a little nervous about the fertility questions that may arise over the next week -- not to mention a few that have already arisen.
Mind you, my husband is Indian, and as any Indian daughter or DIL can probably tell you, the pressure to have a baby starts immediately upon marriage; making any DIL who fails in this most simple task, to be left open for chiding and discussion by the rest of the family. Not exactly being the first choice DIL material (what with being American and Jewish and all that), I at least thought this would be the one task I could and would succeed in, and I truly wanted to succeed (with every childless part of my being), but sadly we all know the outcome. Luckily, my sweet and wonderful MIL knows somewhat of our trials and difficulties, and she has lovingly held back from asking any questions during our recent telephone calls.
Anyway...on to the second scene:
Same vacation, different day, DH's cousins brings up a much feared (by me) conversation. You see, when DH and I were married, his cousins jokingly bet on how long it would take for us to get "knocked up". It was all good fun to talk about back then, back when I was innocent and thought one month off the pill would see me preggers and already buying nursery items... Anyway, fun cousin #1 made a joke about losing the bet (she bet it would take less than 12 months), and scolded me for making her lose. I really wanted to laugh, and it would actually have been funny had we not found out we are infertile and had I not been crying like a banshee a week earlier over getting my period, but in that moment I just wanted to curl up and die. It's time like this, I wonder if I should just tell them the whole awful truth.
Next week we will be visiting with my best friend's family, who are basically my extended family, and I just know there will be comments and questions...especially since one of the sisters, who will be there, recently had a beauty of a baby and she got married after us. I am right now pre-wincing with pain, and hoping to get it all out of my system here on this blog. Wish me luck, and good luck to all you ladies wading in the same waters.