Tuesday, October 19, 2010

The follow-up

My visit with the OB/GYN revealed some scary news about anovulation and fertility drugs, along with a mile long to do list of tests to be done over the course of my next menstrual cycle.  Among these tests, an anxiety inducing procedure called a hysterosalpingogram, will be used to find out the extent of my bicornuate uterus, and whether or not this may become yet another factor of concern in my quest to get pregnant...seriously, one more thing going wrong?

The part of me trying to stay positive, focuses on my sister's two beautiful children, both conceived despite her PCOS diagnosis, and both perfectly healthy (thank goodness).  Then the negative sneaks in with taunts that I'll never know the feeling of growing a new life inside me, and I'll never see the face of my own baby - part me and part my wonderful husband - hold it in my arms, breathe in his/her newness, and fall asleep knowing that he/she exists and is all mine.

I won't stop hoping that someday, somehow I will get pregnant and I will deliver a healthy baby.

2 comments:

  1. **HUGS** I think most if not all women and men suffering from fertility issues think that at one point or another. It stinks that we have to go through these things just to get what everyone else seems to at the drop of a hat.

    My own HSG wasn't bad at all. I had no cramping during or after. Only uncomfortable part was the RE pinching the crap out of my vag and trying to get some kind of suctiony thing on to my cervix. That's not to say yours may go the same way, but hopefully it will go smoothly and give you a lot of answers :)
    Advice, take about 4 ibuprofin about 30min-1hr before the HSG. That should help.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks Lisa. I've been reading some horror stories about HSGs, and it is reassuring to hear that yours wasn't so terrible.
    Oh, and congrats on the weight loss!

    ReplyDelete