My visit with the OB/GYN revealed some scary news about anovulation and fertility drugs, along with a mile long to do list of tests to be done over the course of my next menstrual cycle. Among these tests, an anxiety inducing procedure called a hysterosalpingogram, will be used to find out the extent of my bicornuate uterus, and whether or not this may become yet another factor of concern in my quest to get pregnant...seriously, one more thing going wrong?
The part of me trying to stay positive, focuses on my sister's two beautiful children, both conceived despite her PCOS diagnosis, and both perfectly healthy (thank goodness). Then the negative sneaks in with taunts that I'll never know the feeling of growing a new life inside me, and I'll never see the face of my own baby - part me and part my wonderful husband - hold it in my arms, breathe in his/her newness, and fall asleep knowing that he/she exists and is all mine.
I won't stop hoping that someday, somehow I will get pregnant and I will deliver a healthy baby.