I wanted to start off this post by sending a little love to the TV personality Giuliana Rancic and her husband Bill. The poor woman has been through so much, and yet she continues to do so much as a voice for the infertility community. She has been and continues to be, incredibly public about each and every detail of her medical journey...even now when she has had to make the painful decision to go through a double mastectomy in order to not only save her life, but to also give her some hope of still conceiving a child at some point in the future. All I can say is that I wish her and Bill all the best and I truly hope they are able to conceive and have a healthy child once this terrible cancer is defeated.
In other news:
I've made it to 39 weeks, and so far this little one doesn't seem ready to make her debut. I've tried all the tricks, but it's no go. I can only assume my little lady is comfy as can be, and has decided to stick around inside for awhile. I got a little excited by a particularly strong Braxton Hicks contraction earlier today, but it seems it was just the one, and now we are back to the usual, less exciting belly tightening routine.
One odd but kind of neat thing that has happened, and it might be TMI, just as a warning...
After trying out some Medela soft shells, in order to prepare my slightly inverted nipples for the task of feeding my bub, I noticed some milk had leaked into one of the shells. Apparently I had expressed it after wearing the shell for just a couple of hours. Part of me was worried that I'd somehow done something wrong, and should stop wearing them, but the other part was just fascinated that my breasts had actually produced something. I felt incredibly proud of my breasts (hey, they work!) and of my body, and even more confident that I am ready for this next step.
I've been thinking more and more about our two frosties, wondering if we will need to use them or will some miracle happen along the way, wondering if they won't actually be enough and we will find ourselves faced with doing a fresh IVF cycle, and wondering if we didn't use them, what we would do with them. It seems so strange to think of those two little embryos, and to realize that if we make siblings from them, those siblings will actually have been conceived on the same day as our first baby, but one had to be chosen to come first, and so that one was picked while the others waited in cold storage. How do you explain that to your children?
I am trying to avoid having feelings for those frosties, as I know they may never actually take hold in my uterus and become babies, but it still seems so odd to think of them just "out there", in the world, in a freezer somewhere in IL. Does anyone else feel this way, or am I just losing it?
In other news:
I've made it to 39 weeks, and so far this little one doesn't seem ready to make her debut. I've tried all the tricks, but it's no go. I can only assume my little lady is comfy as can be, and has decided to stick around inside for awhile. I got a little excited by a particularly strong Braxton Hicks contraction earlier today, but it seems it was just the one, and now we are back to the usual, less exciting belly tightening routine.
One odd but kind of neat thing that has happened, and it might be TMI, just as a warning...
After trying out some Medela soft shells, in order to prepare my slightly inverted nipples for the task of feeding my bub, I noticed some milk had leaked into one of the shells. Apparently I had expressed it after wearing the shell for just a couple of hours. Part of me was worried that I'd somehow done something wrong, and should stop wearing them, but the other part was just fascinated that my breasts had actually produced something. I felt incredibly proud of my breasts (hey, they work!) and of my body, and even more confident that I am ready for this next step.
I've been thinking more and more about our two frosties, wondering if we will need to use them or will some miracle happen along the way, wondering if they won't actually be enough and we will find ourselves faced with doing a fresh IVF cycle, and wondering if we didn't use them, what we would do with them. It seems so strange to think of those two little embryos, and to realize that if we make siblings from them, those siblings will actually have been conceived on the same day as our first baby, but one had to be chosen to come first, and so that one was picked while the others waited in cold storage. How do you explain that to your children?
I am trying to avoid having feelings for those frosties, as I know they may never actually take hold in my uterus and become babies, but it still seems so odd to think of them just "out there", in the world, in a freezer somewhere in IL. Does anyone else feel this way, or am I just losing it?
Lol, I had to check and see if any milk production was going on after reading your posting but nothing:[ I had a consistent crampy feeling through the night but today has been less consistent with the tightening... still I like to think feeling anything is progress! We only had 2 embryos to transfer and none to freeze so I haven't thought about the 'what ifs' with frosties but I believe I would be having the same thoughts if we did. Yay for being so close to the finish line!!! Good luck! :]
ReplyDeleteFirst, congrats that you made it to the all important 39th week. It will be soon.
ReplyDeleteSecond, you are not strange to think of your frosties. I think of mine all the time. They are your kids! They are life. I hope you are able to meet them someday as I hope to meet mine.
Congrats on making it to 39 weeks! I can't wait to see your bub. Its funny that you mention relief over producing milk because at 33 weeks I don't think my milk is close to coming and I'm kind of freaking out.
ReplyDeleteSending lots of labor dust your way!!