Saturday, December 10, 2011

Addendum to last post

Hey Everyone,

I just wanted to quickly apologize if my last post seemed overly whiny.  I did finally get a little sleep last night, with the help of the Amb.ien, and today it is like I'm seeing the sun for the first time in a long time.  It is amazing how sleep deprivation messes with your head.

It's not that I've been feeling sorry for myself for the sleep issues, or feeling negative or ungrateful about being pregnant, it is just my intense fear, now so near my due date, that all the sleep deprivation will cause problems with having a healthy labor and delivery...which is not an unfounded fear according to my midwives.

I've had sleep difficulties throughout pregnancy, as does pretty much everyone who goes through it, but these last couple of weeks have been different.  I literally have not been able to sleep longer than 30 minutes to an hour (at most) at a time, and even those brief periods are generally few and very broken up.  As of yesterday I was such a mess that I felt like I could easily cry at the drop of a hat, and could barely do anything but lie on the couch and whimper; any little pain or discomfort was making me react like a toddler who had skinned their knee (as in complete, end of world breakdown).  That woman would not have survived an hour of pre-labor, let alone a full labor and delivery. 

Today, after a much better night's sleep, including one almost 4 hour stretch, I feel like a new woman.  I'm still groggy, but my muscles are rested, my brain is working again, and I feel positive and ready to birth this baby. 

Anyway, I just wanted to add this little addendum; just in case anyone was reading my post yesterday, and feeling angered or insulted by my complaints.  Please know that I do realize how incredibly lucky I am to even be here, dealing with these issues.

Best,
KerriK

3 comments:

  1. I'm glad you got some rest! Don't worry about being whiny ;) I'm so excited for you and can't wait to follow your journey into motherhood!

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  2. oh sweetie, sleep is such a glorious thing, so important! I am so glad that you are having a better day today. Tylenol PM is my new best friend, too. So much so that instead of whimpering on the couch, crying at the drop of a hat, like i was last week, I am now feeling bored. I am so rested that I actually feel bored waiting for something to start happening. ML seems so happy to just hang out at home playing with his ipad, but I am bored!

    hang in there. we are so close. :)

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